Just Listed: A Wall-Free Maplewood Kitchen

Yeah, that’s an outdoor kitchen wrapped around a tree in the back yard of this home that’s just gone up for sale in Maplewood. ’Neath the leaves: 2 grills, a wine chiller, a refrigerator, and a stainless steel sink. And inside? A whole lot more . . . plus carpet:

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The 2,632-sq.-ft. home — portions of which date from 1959 — is on Beechnut St., a long block-and-a-half west of Chimney Rock. It has 4 bedrooms and 2 1/2 baths. Asking price: $369,000.

28 Comment

  • Does it include the tacky furniture?

  • Wow. That’s a LOT of “updating.” I propose a new word: “McRanchsion” where a MCM-ish tract house is remodeled to within an inch of its life. Hope the new owners enjoy the taste of leaves and bugs in their outdoor-cooked food.

  • Is that really a wood-panelled FIREPLACE? File under: Not quite clear on the concept.

  • it’s sad that the outdoor kitchen is better than the indoor one. With that much updating, they could have done a better job on the kitchen space.

  • The seller needs a bigger house to handle all that overscaled ugly furniture. The backyard kitchen is total overkill and, besides being filthy from tree droppings, will be a great roach attraction until it falls apart. Someone’s been watching too many HGTV shows.

  • This house is something!
    I imagine it’s in great shape / well-maintained.
    It really reflects the owners’ personality – which is why it should be STAGED asap!

  • They probably got a good deal on all that curly-q carpeting. All of it.

  • One can assume from the interior “decor” as well as the exterior “decor” that the house is reflective of a cultural emphasis on large gatherings with lots of barbequed things. With lots of people eating the lots of barbequed things.

    I love the dolphin mosaic in the pool. Reminds me of a Motel 6 outside of Acapulco.

    I do want the coffee table. Wonder if they’ll sell it apart from the house?

  • How many Persian-owned convenience stores selling brillo pads to crack-heads do you need to decorate this place? How in heck did they ever find room for the pool???

  • Heh…McRanchsion…

  • Is that a polished granite floor in the kitchen and utility room? Jeez, what a safety hazard. One misstep on a wet patch and it’s lights out when the cranium cracks the granite. On the other hand, it does continue the, er, active pattern of the wall-to-wall carpeting.

  • So, are both sofas and coffee tables in the same room?

  • That furniture is horrid – the house has been styled within an inch of its life. Where is the personality, the individuality? Someone needs to tell these people everything doesn’t have to match. I fail to understand why McMansion Chic has remained popular for so long.

  • How many trips to Hobby Lobby does it take to fill a McRanchsion?

  • From PYEWACKET2:

    So, are both sofas and coffee tables in the same room?

    _______________________________

    No. The second photos appear to be the den. With the square table. Which is the one I want. They should have “mixed and matched” the tables. But who am I to offer such advice? Looks like they took out the actual entry and combined the living room with the den. Which would have worked better with the entry remaining in place.

    The carpeting at least is more Hyatt than Motel 6. Just not the Hyatt in Acapulco. More like Des Moines.

    From miss_msry:

    How many Persian-owned convenience stores selling brillo pads to crack-heads do you need to decorate this place? How in heck did they ever find room for the pool???

    ________________________________

    You haven’t spent much time in Mexico. This is Mexican. Not Persian. See any Persian rugs? Mexican Provincial as they call it. A little Italian, a little Spanish, and a lot of French “froo-froo.”

    Can be very nice. With a good decorator. They spent a lot of money on the tile and granite. They should have stuck with the granite and avoided the carpet. Or added some patterned Mexican tiles at least in the living areas.

  • Matt Mystery, do you mean “Spanish flair?”

    And is froo-froo similar to chi-chi?

  • From Miz Brooke Smith:

    Matt Mystery, do you mean “Spanish flair?”

    And is froo-froo similar to chi-chi?

    __________________________

    No. It’s Mexican Provincial. Found even in some of the better homes in Las Lomas and San Angel in Mexico City. Sometimes stained, sometimes antiqued, sometimes gilded. Sometimes mixed with the Screwy Louies. Louis XIV, XV, and XVI that is.

    “Froo-froo” is an adjective. “Chi-chi” is an attitude.

  • I drive by this house nearly every day and see the Sellers out waxing their Corvette and Suburbans and Chevy trucks with impossibly wide white wall tires most weekends – Matt Mystery knows of what he speaks – Mexican provincial it is….

  • Truly hideous.

  • This is truly awful. Mexican rococo at its finest.

  • From Different Matt:

    This is truly awful. Mexican rococo at its finest.
    _____________________________

    Rococo = “froo-froo.”

  • I think it’s spelled “frou-frou.”

  • From Apartment dweller:

    I think it’s spelled “frou-frou.”
    _________________________

    I think you’re right. So I’m not perfect.

    It is not a bad style or a bad look. In this case there are just too many “earth tones.”

    But we each have our own styles. And our own color preferences. And not all of us can afford to spend $100,000 on a decorator for “a look” that often isn’t us anyway. But looks good in magazines.

  • The nicest thing about this house?

    The front-loading, large-capacity, uber-quiet cherry red Electrolux washer & dryer.

    Serious.

  • What’s the purpose of the W-shaped wall between the kitchen and the pool? Is it just for looks?

    And am I the only one who’s ready to see the end of beveled glass entry doors? Except they do seem to serve as warnings of excess within.

  • Scallops, with caps. Galloping fun: mishap.

  • I actually like the outdoor kitchen, although not the countertop encircling the tree.
    .
    Would it actually attract roaches? I dunno. I cook outdoors a lot on a Home Depot propane grill, which I don’t exactly keep spotless. I’ve never seen a roach anywhere near it. My attached garage, which is squeaky-clean, except for the odd dropped toddler snack, routinely gathers roaches.
    .
    For people who like to host big parties outdoors, this makes sense. Could have been done better.
    .
    The pool is tacky, as is most of the interior. Is that matching granite on the kitchen floor and the countertops?

  • I wonder if these are these the folks that will be building on Jerry J. Moore’s old place on Friar Tuck?