02/27/08 1:01pm

El Torito Lounge, Harrisburg Blvd., Houston

Houston’s lone professional tourists, John Nova Lomax and David Beebe, stop off at the Brady’s Island in the Ship Channel midway into their latest day-long stroll . . . through this city’s southeastern stretches:

The air is foul here, and the eastern view is little more than a forest of tall crackers and satanic fume-belching smokestacks, sending clouds of roasted-cabbage-smelling incense skyward to Mammon, all bisected by the amazingly tall East Loop Ship Channel Bridge, its pillars standing in the toxic bilge where Brays Bayou dumps its effluent into the great pot of greenish-brown petro-gumbo.

While Brady’s Landing today seems to survive as a function room – a sort of Rainbow Lodge for the Ship Channel, with manicured grounds that reminded Beebe of Astroworld — decades ago, people came here to eat and to take in the view. This was progress to them, this horrifically awesome vista showed how we beat the Nazis and Japanese and how we were gonna stave off them godless Commies. As for me, it made me think of Beebe’s maxim: “Chicken and gasoline don’t mix.”

More from the duo’s march through “Deep Harrisburg”: Flag-waving Gulf Freeway auto dealerships, an early-morning ice house near the Almeda Mall, a razorwire-fenced artist compound in Garden Villas, Harold Farb’s last stand, colorful Broadway muffler joints, the hidden gardens of Thai Xuan, and — yes, gas-station chicken.

“There is nothing else like the Southeast side,” Lomax adds in a comment:

I see it as the true heart of Houston. Without the port and the refineries we are nothing. The prosperous West Side could be Anywhere, USA, but the Southeast Side could only be here.

Photo of El Torito Lounge on Harrisburg: John Nova Lomax and David Beebe

02/05/08 11:13am

My Houston Home Page, from visithoustontexas.com

The Greater Houston Convention and Visitor Bureau’s celebrity-laden “My Houston” campaign hits the web!!! And it sure looks a lot like Facebook or MySpace, doesn’t it? All the kewl kids are on it, like Beyonce, and Yao, and AJ, and George and Barbara, and Chloe, and Yolanda. And they’re all saying great things about your city!!!

Only . . . there doesn’t seem to be a way to post your own page. Or add your comments to theirs. Or participate in any way.

All those local celebrities? They are not your friends. Clay and Brian and Hilary are not in your extended network.

Loser.

11/09/07 10:28am

Gondolas

Hidden in today’s Chronicle update on the Dome’s status are a few more exciting details about the Astrodome Redevelopment Corporation’s still-mysterious plans to remake the former home of the Astros and Oilers into a convention hotel. It’s gonna be like a county fair!

Company CEO John Clanton casually mentions that the new hotel will have seven restaurants and an amusement park, possibly including a ride to “near the top of the Dome,” plus tethered hot-air balloons, a batting cage, and gondolas.

It’s unclear whether Clanton is referring to Venetian-style gondolas for navigating all the new waterways inside, or the kind you see on ski slopes, for crossing the ballfield central fairgrounds. More details on the Astrodome Redevelopment Corp. website!

Oh . . . that’s right. There isn’t one.

After the jump, the real reason County Judge Ed Emmett doesn’t want to demolish the Dome.

CONTINUE READING THIS STORY

11/07/07 8:02am

Astros Vs. Expos at the Astrodome, 1992

More high comedy surrounding the Astrodome: Just what is Texans owner Bob McNair’s problem with the proposal to redevelop the Astrodome into a hotel? It’s . . . the hotel!

“A hotel would be in direct conflict with our games and when the rodeo is going on. You can’t tell guests they can’t come to the hotel on Sundays. That wouldn’t be fair to them. It wouldn’t be fair to our fans.

“We’re trying to be open-minded about this. We’re willing to look at anything that doesn’t conflict with our events.”

Now, you’re probably asking yourself: Haven’t the Texans known that the Astrodome Redevelopment Corporation was wanting to turn the Dome into a hotel now for about . . . what, three years? Wouldn’t the two groups maybe have wanted to chat with each other at some point during that period?

Silly you! You’re presuming that the Texans and the Rodeo and the Harris County Sports and Convention Corporation — Reliant Park’s landlords — actually have some intention or incentive to come up with a workable plan to redevelop the Astrodome. And you’re forgetting that turning the Dome into a hotel was an idea pushed early on by . . . the HCSCC’s chairman, Mike Surface! Remember that space-theme amusement-park concept that was so brilliant that the group that proposed it won the “competition” the HCSCC set up four years ago — even over other developer groups that had more experience and deeper pockets? That group was the Astrodome Redevelopment Corporation.

A year later the ARC scrapped its own space-park concept in favor of the convention-hotel complex pushed by the HCSCC. With the Sports and Convention Corporation’s backing, the company worked in secret for three more years to refine the proposal.

Good thing the HCSCC didn’t solicit any alternate proposals during that time. Just think of the confusion that would have caused!

Photo of Astrodome from August 28, 1992: Flickr user j4e0f0f

11/01/07 10:22am

Overhead View of Proposed Astrodome Hotel

You know things must be getting desperate for the Astrodome Redevelopment Corporation, which earlier this week suffered the indignity of having two rather important stakeholders come out against the latest incarnation of the company’s tightly guarded, four-years-in-the-making, Frankenstein-inspired proposal for bringing the Dome back to life. When they finally got to see the proposal, “recently,” the Texans and the Livestock Show & Rodeo decided the Astrodome’s new incarnation would be incompatible with their own operations.

But the greatest indication of the redevelopment group’s desperation was revealed just yesterday in local ABC-TV reporter Miya Shay’s blog. That’s right, the Astrodome Redevelopment Corporation is going for broke: The company finally decided to release to the public actual images of its proposal for the county-owned facility!

Yes, it’s a daring strategy to use on a property paid for by local taxpayers, but it just might work.

After the jump: the newly released images of the Astrodome hotel-under-glass!

CONTINUE READING THIS STORY

10/31/07 11:46am

Reliant Astrodome

A funny thing happened on the Astrodome Redevelopment Corp.‘s way to, uh . . . redevelop the Astrodome: They forgot to get buy-in on their kitchen-sink proposal from a few important parties:

The $450 million plan to reinvent the Reliant Astrodome as an upscale convention hotel may have hit a wall Tuesday when the Texans and Houston rodeo officials came out against it.

The Texans and the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo’s contracts may give them veto power over new development at Reliant Park. Also, a letter of intent signed by the county and Astrodome Redevelopment Corp. requires the company to get the Texans and the rodeo to sign off on the project.

Oops! Hey, it might have been a good idea to ask these folks what they would approve of—before spending four years scheming in their secret design bunker. Just a suggestion . . .

“Not until we saw their plans recently did we realize that this project has the ability to cannibalize our operations,” said Leroy Shafer, the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo’s chief operating officer. “Every dollar spent that is spent there is one that might not be spent at the rodeo.”

Jamey Rootes, president of the Houston Texans, said the team was worried that the hotel would hamper the flow of fans in and out of Reliant Park on the team’s 10 game days.

The nerve! The response from Scott Hanson, president of the Astrodome Redevelopment Corp.:

Frankly, we are quite shocked by the Rodeo’s position. We have been working with the Rodeo organization for quite some time and were hopeful that our proposed redevelopment would only enhance their month-long event.

Apparently, “working with” does not include “sharing details of the proposal before it is complete.”

At last, the beauty of the Sports and Convention Corporation’s original plot from a few years ago is revealed: give exclusive rights to flail about in secret in search of a new use for the Dome to a company that, um . . . is really good at being secretive and flailing.

Coming next from those brilliant Dome masters: If these jokers can’t figure out what to do with that thing, maybe no jokers can!

Astrodome photo: Flickr user here_we_are

10/11/07 10:57am

Swedish Antiques at the Lone Ranger in Warrenton, Texas

Couldn’t get out of town last weekend? Francophile designer Joni Webb features a photo tour of Round Top’s semiannual antiques extravaganza on her Cote de Texas blog:

Once, the Round Top Antique Festival meant Americana and Texana antiques. Today, French, Swedish, and English antiques have overtaken the prominence that Americana and Texana once enjoyed. Now highbrow antiques share space with the very lowbrow: vintage, bric a brac, and just plain junk are plentiful in areas where the rent for stalls is cheap.

After the jump, more photos of vintage junk!

CONTINUE READING THIS STORY

09/07/07 10:19am

Carnival in the Astrodome

The crack team that the Astrodome’s unelected caretakers selected four years ago to redevelop the Houston landmark—for the brilliance of their proposed idea and their ability to make it happen—has changed its concept yet again! This time, though, the secretive group really has got it right. No more Space Theme Park. No more Ye Olde Fake Texas Courthouse Hotel Under Glass. This time, it’s a . . . modernish hotel . . . wrapped by a parking garage . . . with rides . . . and ponds and trees . . . and leftover parts of a ballfield . . . and conventioneers!

A faux Texas courthouse and other features that played on the state’s past are out. Plans now call for including a section of the Dome’s seats, part of the diamond and an overall contemporary design that plays up the building’s cutting-edge nature when it opened in 1965.

“We’re going to have rides. There could be air rides that take you off the ground and make you say, ‘Wow,’ ” said Scott Hanson, president of Astrodome Redevelopment Co., the firm hoping to transform the Dome. “We’re going to have a few of those. They would be easy-going rides that would show off the venue.”

Brilliant! Now, all they’ll have to do is convince five county commissioners in secret session, and the private takeover of a public stadium county taxpayers have paid billions of dollars for will be complete.

Astrodome carnival photo: Flickr user Jeff Balke

09/06/07 11:21am

Roller Coaster on the Kemah Boardwalk Under Construction, June 2007

Worried that deed restrictions won’t protect your home from someone putting up ugly townhouses on your street?

Big whup. On the Kemah Boardwalk, the next-door neighbors of Coy and Carol Killion decided to build a 96-foot-tall roller coaster.

The Boardwalk Bullet is now a few dozen feet from the house. For 12 hours a day, the family listens to the coaster’s squeaks and rattles and the screams of 800 passengers an hour rolling by at 50 mph.

“It’s such a shame, really. We all used to just love the peaceful quiet,” said Carol Killion, who built the house in 1962. “It’s what we enjoyed about it, away from the big city.”

The Killions, of course, still refuse to sell their home to Landry’s.

“As long as I live, it will not be sold to him,” she declared, referring to Landry’s President Tilman Fertitta.

This weekend, the coaster’s noise drove them all from the porch: Killion, her husband, Coy, and her son, daughter-in-law and two grandsons. “You can’t even carry on a conversation,” she said. “I don’t think we’ll even be able to barbecue.”

No public hearing was ever held to inform residents about the coaster.

The city has no zoning, and the coaster met all setback requirements, a Kemah city administrator told the Houston Chronicle in July. Carol Killion said a lawsuit would be just too exhausting.

Boardwalk Bullet photo: Kira Hamilton

09/06/07 10:37am

Gulf Greyhound Park

How’s business at the world’s largest greyhound-racing venue? Not so brisk, reports the Houston Press:

The clubhouse and restaurant are now closed. There’s no more valet parking. Ebbs estimates that total attendance at Gulf on a good night is around 1,200. “When I got into it, dog and horse racing were the only games in town,” he says. “I’ve watched the whole gambling scene really blow up since the early ’90s. Greyhound and horse racing have gone from the only games in town to just one of many choices.”

But there’s hope to bring back customers:

Mike Parmetti, Gulf’s Marketing Director, is working on strategies to lure people to the track. Thursday is 50-cent draft beer night. There are Harley-Davidson giveaways and free trips to Las Vegas during the summer. On Fridays, there’s an all-you-can-eat crawfish buffet for $9.95. Then, there’s something called Dog Chip Bingo, advertised with this teaser: “If your puppy poops or pees in the right position, win a prize!”

Any better ideas?

Parmetti and Ebbs think slot machines — called Video Lottery Terminals at the tracks — might be the saving grace of Texas dog racing. They are convinced that slots will bring the dog tracks back to life without creating the sorts of vices gambling opponents fear. “You can’t create gambling problems,” Parmetti says. “If you could, we’d find a way to do it and pack this place out.”

Some Democrats, like State Sen. Rodney Ellis, have shown a willingness to support gambling because it would increase much-needed tax revenue. Year by year, the issue seems to be gaining traction. Without gambling, some say all the Texas tracks could be out of business in the next decade.

Photo of Gulf Greyhound Park: Flickr user HiggieFresh

07/30/07 9:44pm

After some “research,” Forbes declares Houston the fourth-best place to flip a house. Meanwhile, Forbes Traveler says Houston is the ninth-most-visited city in the U.S.

Coincidence? Or has Forbes simply stumbled upon the awful truth about our city: visitors, upset by a lack of tourist attractions, have turned to quick real-estate thrills instead.

Maybe that explains the Tremont Tower train wreck.