05/02/11 9:23am

Upset at New York Senator Chuck Schumer’s oh-so-cruel insinuation that Houston isn’t much of a tourist town, local talk-show host Michael Berry has responded with an ad on this billboard, carefully situated at the scenic crotch between the Southwest Freeway feeder road and the Westpark Tollway near Chimney Rock, surrounded by a number of fine automotive repair establishments. It’s been 13 days since your outrageous insult, Senator. Apologize now or it’s just going to get worse. Sure hope it doesn’t have to come to that, but don’t think we won’t resort to putting a bunch of those inflatable gorillas on top of the Downtown Aquarium to get our point across — if we have to. [Previously on Swamplot] Photo: Swamplot inbox

04/29/11 10:55am

There’s lumber sliced every which way on the walls here in gated Indian Trails, west of Chimney Rock. This 4-bedroom, 3 1/2-bath home, which sits in the 500-year floodplain just south of Buffalo Bayou, was custom-built for its original owner in 1974, back when people weren’t so uptight as we are today about laying wood only vertically or horizontally. We haven’t seen a house with so many different interior wood treatments since . . . oh, this one in Braes Terrace, a few years ago . . . and that didn’t last too long.

Walls, how can we cover thee? Let us count the ways:

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04/27/11 12:52pm

A view of the mix at the corner strip center at Westheimer and Fountainview, where a driver crashed this morning into the storefront of the Yogurtland at 5901 Westheimer, then plowed through an interior wall into the Any Lab Test Now! location next door.

Photo: KHOU

04/06/11 2:12pm

HARTS GOING, GOING, GOING . . . TO PRISON Auctioneers and swindlers Jerry and Wynonne Hart will begin serving their 14-year prison sentences “within days,” after an appeals court reversed a decision that would have given the former owners of the Hart Galleries on South Voss a new trial. The Harts pled guilty to “misapplication of fiduciary property” 2 years ago, in return for prosecutors dropping theft and money-laundering charges against them. Prosecutors claim the Harts sold customers’ goods at auction but regularly underpaid or otherwise finagled their way out of distributing the proceeds. [Houston Chronicle; previously on Swamplot] Photo: Hart Galleries

01/07/11 11:01am

What’s the safety of your family worth, anyway? Is $2,052,218 really too high a price to pay for the security of knowing that when the revolution/apocalypse/nuclear winter/plague of locusts/hurricane/historic designation comes, your loved ones could be comfortably ensconced in their very own bomb shelter? And look! A trained school of security fish stand guard by the shelter’s entrance — in their very own BB-proof booth. Plus, right next door, there’s a $5 million home!

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10/26/10 9:21pm

Got an answer to any of these reader questions? Or just want to be a sleuth for Swamplot? Here’s your chance! Add your report in a comment, or send a note to our tipline.

  • Galveston: Watercolor artist Don Springer, who makes a habit of rendering area oddities, wants to know more about the Galveston Kettle House on the San Luis Pass between Pirates Beach and Pirates Beach West he painted a few weekends ago. “I know that it was not the radio station KUFO which once broadcasted from the foot of the Flagship (That flying saucer is now a house on West Beach).” He passes on a story he heard from “credible sources” that the half-water-tower turned house was the home of a landscaper who recently passed away, but asks, “Can you use your unlimited resourses, connections, and talent to determine the history of this landmark before it rolls off into the sunset?” Readers? He’s talking to you.
  • Montrose: Chronicle tech guy Dwight Silverman wants to know what’s going into the building at 1721 Waugh, just south of the Commonwealth split; at about the same time, another Swamplot reader sends us this recent pic of what looks to be a refacing job on the building:

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10/06/10 2:03pm

COMMENT OF THE DAY: DUMPSTER MODERN “This one looked like the love child of Bushwood Country Club and the Houston Junior League building on the inside, but remove the Boise State football field, consign grandma’s victorian chandelier collection, remove grandpa’s smoke infested wood paneling and replace with a mix of ranch-modern interior and 21st century awesome…[and] this place would rock.” [jg, commenting on Daily Demolition Report: Ocee What’s No Longer There] Photo: HAR

06/11/10 10:11am

WHAT TO LOOK FOR IN YOUR JACK SACK SOON Bankrupted weight-loss guru Shaun Kelley, who abruptly shut down his fitness center on Voss near San Felipe last month and announced plans for a new business venture with “a major food company,” is also gone from Donald Trump’s multi-level-marketing scheme, where he had planned to promote “custom pharmaceutical-grade vitamins”: “Kelley says he’s no longer working with the Trump Network, but instead is moving yet another concept. ‘I have a new investor who didn’t want me to have anything to do with the gym anymore and we’re solely focused on the food industry,’ he says. ‘We’re currently in negotiations with Jack in the Box to offer a low fat healthy food for $3 to $7.’” [Houston Business Journal; previously on Swamplot]

03/29/10 2:02pm

What inside info does Swamplot have to spill about this 6,648-sq.-ft. mansion on more than an acre off Memorial Dr. in Bayou Woods?

Absolutely none. Really: We don’t know a thing about it.

Okay, okay — nothing other than . . . uh, publicly available information. And this little reader comment last week that tipped us all off. Yeah, you read it too!

“Vinny Ocean” is selling his Memorial mansion. It is now listed at [$]3.5M. How much would YOU offer knowing that some mouthbreathing NJ thug might not know Palermo sold it and no longer lives there? I’d knock 3M right off the top. You really oughta amble over to HAR and take a look at this place – over the TOP!

Who’s Vinny Ocean?

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03/17/10 6:35pm

Never mind that wine bars the Wine Bucket, the Corkscrew, and the Tasting Room in Midtown have all been poured down the drain since January. Krutar Patel says he’s planning to open his brand new wine bar, Winetopia, this May. He’s already added his placard to the giant brick sign in front of the Fairmont on San Felipe at 6363 San Felipe.

The midrise apartment complex with a retail center on its ground level is already home to a martial-arts studio and a Subway. Winetopia will sandwich itself between the two businesses. Patrons will be able to stumble upstairs to their apartments or, if necessary, to the 24-hour St. Luke’s Community Emergency Center in the same center, conveniently located just yards away.

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12/07/09 9:05am

A quick roundup:

  • Closing in January: NASA hangout the Outpost Tavern, an army barracks building turned spacesuit-and-bikini-festooned party site, down NASA Rd. 1 from the Johnson Space Center at 18113 Kings Lynn St. Memorialized in the appropriately named Clint Eastwood “one last time for the has-been astronauts” flick Space Cowboys, the bar and burger joint had to be partially rebuilt in early 2005 after a short in a neon sign caused a small fire. Second-generation owner Stephanie Foster reports the property has been sold to new owners who “plan to build something new on the site, perhaps a service station or shopping center.” Fans of the Outpost Tavern’s many good ol’ days will drown their sorrows on-site in a 3-day-long goodbye-party bash, January 8-10.
  • Closed, Just a Month After Opening: The new 7,000-sq.-ft. prototype Bailey Banks & Biddle store in CityCentre. The new owners of the former Zales mall mainstay declared bankruptcy in August, but went ahead with the store’s planned move from its old location across the street at Town & Country Village anyway. Other local Triple Bs didn’t get the grand-opening treatment before going dark: “The Galleria and Willowbrook Mall locations are in liquidation, while The Woodlands Mall store and the new CityCentre location are expected to go dark on Dec. 24 following liquidation sales, according to store employees.”
  • Open Only for One Last Big Sale: Brian Stringer Antiques, strung along West Alabama just east of Shepherd in a few separate buildings for the last 40 or so years. Stringer and his wife will retire to their turreted 14th century chateau — a former fortified hospital built by monks for victims of a mysterious skin disease — in the French countryside between Bordeaux and Gers. But lucky us, they’ll stick around Houston long enough to sell the majority of their stock of European antiques, reproductions, and fabrics at 40 percent off, Joni Webb reports: “The French house is so charming – you really feel like you’re in the South of France, except for Houston’s traffic out the front window!” When you’re done shopping there, Webb commands:

    be sure to also stop in at Ginger Barber’s Sitting Room which is next door. Further up the street is Tara Shaw and Heather Bowen Antiques. Continue up W. Alabama to Antiques and Interiors on Dunlavy, Boxwood and The Country Gentleman, then hit up Foxglove and Alcon Lighting.

    If you haven’t passed out from exhaustion yet, turn around and head back to Brian Stringer’s and go the other way on W. Alabama. Stop at Jane Moore’s, then at Ferndale, go to Brown, Bill Gardner, Made in France, and Objects Lost and Found. Back on W. Alabama, continue on to Thompson and Hansen, The Gray Door, Chateau Domingue, Indulge on Saint Street, and 2620 on Joanel.

More openings and closings:

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11/12/09 7:26pm

TAKE THE MONEY AND IRAN “Federal prosecutors are seeking to seize the Islamic Education Center at 2313 S. Voss, just north of Westheimer, as part of a move against the Alavi Foundation, nonprofit organization with suspected ties to the Iranian government: “Faheem Kazimi, chairman of the board of directors of IEC, said tonight that the center leases its building from Alavi Foundation. No other connection exists, he said. . . . The Center’s premises on South Voss is occupied by one of Houston’s largest Shiia mosques and Al-Hadi School of Accelerative Learning, a private Islamic school. . . . The mosque . . . will remain open while the forfeiture case works its way through court in what could be a long process. What will happen to them if the government ultimately prevails is unclear. But the government typically sells properties it has seized through forfeiture, and the proceeds are sometimes distributed to crime victims. There were no raids Thursday as part of the forfeiture action. The government is simply required to post notices of the civil complaint on the property. Prosecutors said the Alavi Foundation, through a front company known as Assa Corp., illegally funneled millions in rental income back to Iran’s state-owned Bank Melli. Bank Melli has been accused by a U.S. Treasury official of providing support for Iran’s nuclear program, and it is illegal in the United States to do business with the bank.” [Houston Chronicle]

09/15/09 2:11pm

FORMER MOB BOSS TO PENTHOUSE CLUB: KEEP YOUR PANTS ON The Penthouse Club just off Westheimer at 2618 Winrock — shut down by the city a year ago for violating the city’s sexually oriented business ordinance — is reopening this Thursday! But . . . there’ll be no nudity this time, promises the club’s global licensing director. Who owns the club? According to KPRC Local 2 Investigates reporter Robert Arnold, that would be admitted murderer turned government witness Vincent Palermo, the former acting boss of New Jersey’s DeCavalcante crime family: “In addition to the mansion on Memorial Drive, Local 2 found Palermo, now using the last name Cabella, also owns the property that is the Penthouse Club on Winrock Boulevard near Westheimer Road. Harris County records show he also owns the Mexican food restaurant [Ruchi’s Grill] in front of the Penthouse and the [Super Clean] car wash behind the club. State records show a company called “Hereweareagain, inc.” owns and operates the Penthouse Club, and another company called “6430 Westheimer, inc” owns and operates All Stars Cabaret across the street from Penthouse. Palermo’s wife and son are listed on corporate filings for these companies.” [Click2Houston; previously on Swamplot]

05/27/09 11:57am

THE GREAT HOUSTON STRIP CLUB CRACKDOWN The arrests last week of 6 dancers, the DJ, the manager, and the “house mother” at the All-Star Men’s Club on the corner of Winrock and Westheimer — along with legal action against the club for operating a sexually oriented business without a license — are the latest rounds: “‘This is part of a bigger effort by the White administration to use the powers that are available to the city to protect and improve the quality of life in the city’s neighborhoods,’ said private attorney Patrick Zummo, who was hired by the city to help enforce its sexually oriented business ordinance. ‘We are working on another lawsuit that would include many of those businesses that are operating illegally, and which will probably be filed in the next couple of weeks.’ . . . Frank Michel, a spokesman for Mayor Bill White, confirmed Friday’s legal action is the beginning of an offensive against sex clubs that operate in areas where they would not qualify for a city license.” [Houston Chronicle, via Boyd’s Blog]; previously in Swamplot]

04/28/09 10:32am

Jerry and Wynonne Hart are scheduled to be sentenced today for “misapplication of fiduciary property” in the operation of their auction business at the Hart Galleries. In return for the couple’s guilty plea, prosecutors dropped charges of theft and money laundering.

11 News reporter Dave Fehling spoke to several former Hart Galleries customers:

The auction house thrived for years. The Harts enjoyed a sterling reputation among the rich and not so rich who all trusted the Harts to sell their valuables. But around 2003, something strange began happening . . .

. . . the Harts auctioned furniture and antiques for John Zielinski and his wife.

They were expecting to get $20,000.

“And I said, ‘where’s our money?’ And they said, ‘we’re having difficulty collecting some of the checks,’” said Zielinski.

The next thing Harts’ customers learned was that the couple was bankrupt.

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