COMMENT OF THE DAY: THEY ONLY CALL HOUSTON SPRAWLING BECAUSE THERE’S NOT A WHOLE LOT ELSE TO NOTICE — YET 
“Sorry, but Houston is no more sprawled than any other large metros. Look at aerial imagery of any of the big ones. Just because Atlanta, Dallas, Phoenix, LA, Chicago, etc. all have organized sprawl (zoning), doesn’t mean it’s any better than our non-zoned city sprawl. My point: sprawl is sprawl. I think cities like Houston get called out more when it comes to sprawl because of our lack of density in our core. As the inner loop core keeps densifying and gains a more wide spread identity, I think the sprawl argument against Houston will level out. . . .” [Ed, commenting on New ‘City with No Limits’ Slogan Will Be a Catchy, Fun Way To Promote Houston’s Legendary Sprawl] Illustration: Lulu
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COMMENT OF THE DAY: A STRUCTURAL ENGINEER EXPLAINS PARKING GARAGE COLLAPSES 
“. . . Structural design is generally done by computing an anticipated load (how much will the stuff in the building weigh?), multiplying that by a safety factor, and then designing a structure with enough strength to support that “factored†load. Modern building codes also estimate the anticipated strength as less than it actually is too (for errors in materials/construction). Structures generally end up with at least 3 times as much strength as they need. That said, parking structures typically have the lowest factor of safety built into their design. They fail much more often than other building types because a) they’re so cheaply constructed, b) the loading is so much lighter than other types of structures that factoring doesn’t increase the loading by as many tons, and c) failure rarely results in loss of life.
@TL: You mentioned that there was a loud creek and then it failed? Any guess how long that creak lasted? 5 seconds, 3 minutes, an hour? I ask because concrete structures like this (ESPECIALLY pre-stressed concrete structures) are designed so that IF they fail, the rebar in them is the last thing to go, which will stretch and stretch and stretch gradually so that people have a chance to GTFO. The alternative is what’s called a brittle failure, where there’s just one loud pop and then bam; no warning at all.
. . . Engineers always talk about this stuff in terms of ‘strain’ and ‘yield.’ Strain is how much a material can deform (stretch or compress). When the strain gets too much, the structure ‘yields’ or permanently deforms. For a concrete structure, deform === collapse. The last thing to go before a concrete structure collapses is the reinforcing steel, which has a maximum strain of about 0.02 (2%) before yielding. That means if the clear span (beam-to-beam distance) is 30 feet, you can have a sag of 30 ft / 2 * 0.02 = 3.6 inches before it actually damages the structure. Parking garage widths are typically 64 feet, which can have ~7.5 inches of sag in the middle.” [Ornlu, commenting on A Top-Down View of Last Night’s Parking Garage Collapse at One Riverway] Illustration: Lulu
USPS, ON THE OTHER HAND, STILL LIKES ‘CLUTCH CITY’ 
The marketing-giddy corners of the internets may be buzzing today about the new “City with No Limits” branding campaign for Houston, but the U.S. Postal Service, it seems, is still stuck on an earlier nickname for the city. Reader Christopher Andrews tweets this screenshot showing the results that appear if you ask the USPS website to list all cities in the 77002 Zip Code. Strangely, “Clutch City” does not appear in the results for 77027 — the Zip Code of the former Houston Summit (now Lakewood Church), where the Houston Rockets played when they won the NBA championship in 1994 and 1995. The team didn’t move into the Toyota Center (in 77002) until 2003. [Twitter; try your own Zip Code search here] Screenshot: Christopher Andrews
COMMENT OF THE DAY: WHEN HELICOPTERS RULED THE HOUSTON SKIES 
“Armadillo Airways was the service that flew to IAH from the Galleria, Whitehall Hotel (downtown), Shamrock Hilton and the Westchase Hilton. Flights cost $49 each way. The service was started by the son of the inventor of the Weed Eater.
I remember my dad taking this service from an earlier location in the Globe Department Store parking lot at the SW corner of what is now I-10 & Beltway 8. This all went away with the mid-80′s oil bust. Here is an old pamphlet.” [Holtnow, commenting on A Heliport Lands In Spring Branch East] Illustration: Lulu
HIGH VOLTAGE NEWS FOR HOUSTON BICYCLISTS 
Parks and Rec department director Joe Turner tells the Chronicle‘s Mike Morris that a powerline right-of-way crossing on University of Houston property northeast of the intersection of Martin Luther King Boulevard and Old Spanish Trail will be the first improvement allowed by a new agreement between the city and CenterPoint Energy (subject to city council approval this week) that will allow hike-and-bike trails to be cut along electrical transmission-line right of ways throughout the city. Most likely the next up, according to Turner: a trail from Sims Bayou to Cambridge Village Park in southwest Houston. That route, along with others being contemplated, runs north to south. As Mayor Parker noted in her announcement, that should complement the bayou-side (and therefore mostly east-west) trails being created as part of the Bayou Greenways 2020 project. CenterPoint is donating $1.5 million toward the creation of new trails on their property, possibly because it got what it wanted in the deal, which also involves the conversion of all 165,000 city traffic signals to LEDs over the next 5 years. Writes Morris: “Bills to allow trails on utility right of way were filed as early as 2007 but stalled over questions about how much liability CenterPoint should face in opening its land for recreational use. A compromise was reached last year. The utility is liable only for a serious injury or death caused by its ‘willful or wanton acts or gross negligence.’ Under the agreement announced Friday, the city would pay the utility’s legal bills if lawsuits are filed.” [Houston Chronicle ($); more info; previously on Swamplot] Photo of bike trail along Brays Bayou: Dave Fehling/State Impact
A HELIPORT LANDS IN SPRING BRANCH EAST 
A Swamplot reader is wondering what the story is behind a new helipad that’s landed on the almost-12-acre former industrial site at the northwest corner of the intersection of N. Post Oak Rd. and Westview Dr.: “About a month or more ago they cleared all the brush. A couple of weeks ago they took out the crappy wire fencing. Then they put up a nice tall wooden fence around about half the property. Last week, a helicopter showed up! Google Earth shows the nice new helicopter landing pad, along with a support building. The last thing I expected in Spring Branch was a heliport!” County property records show the lot at 1495 N. Post Oak Rd. was purchased in April of last year by an entity called NPO 1495 LP. A new driveway blocked by a keypad-operated gate now extends off of N. Post Oak and leads to the pad, in the northwest corner of the site, our copter-spotter continues, and adds: “It’s damned weird.” Photo: Swamplot inbox
THAT BAR ON THE RICE HOTEL BALCONY IS CLOSING 
Another change coming to the Rice Lofts, now that an entity connected to the Trammell Crow family has purchased the building from Post Properties, and apartment-management duties are being turned over to Greystar: The State Bar and Lounge, which spilled out onto the Travis St. side of the former Rice Hotel’s second-floor deck facing Texas Ave., is shutting down, sources tell Swamplot. Last call will be late Saturday night. Photo: The State Bar
COMMENT OF THE DAY: NEIGHBORHOODS OF DISTINCTION 
“The irony is that the presence of ‘funky’ places such as this is what made The Montrose attractive to people who were looking for a neighborhood that was outside the ‘norm’ for Houston. But every year more and more of these old denizens of the neighborhood are wiped clean and replaced by the types of developments that people fled from in order to move into The Montrose.” [ShadyHeightster, commenting on Luck, Lease Run Out for Lucky Burger; Montrose Fast Food Joint Closing Soon] Illustration: Lulu
HIGH FIRST WARD HISTORIC DISTRICT GETS CITY COUNCIL HIGH FIVE 
The High First Ward is the newest historic district in Houston, having been voted in by a 12-5 count of city council members this afternoon. The stringy selection of 55 lots (pictured at right), marked down from the original 149, includes properties along Spring, Shearn, Crockett, Summer, White, Silver, Sabine, and Colorado streets in the First Ward, west of Houston Ave. and south of I-10. According to tweeting Chronicle reporter Mike Morris, a motion by council member Stephen Costello to redraw the district map in order to exclude a couple of properties was rejected by a 4-to-13 vote. [Twitter; previously on Swamplot] Map: HAHC
WHAT HAPPENS AFTER LUCKY BURGER CLOSES 
A few more details to add to our ground-beef-breaking report yesterday on the demise of Lucky Burger: The business’s current owners, who’ve operated the 40-year-old fast-food joint at the corner of Richmond Ave. and Mandell for 15 years, plan to retire. An employee tells Culturemap’s Eric Sandler that the owners couldn’t afford the landlord’s pricing for a lease renewal, and that “prospects in Montrose for a space that’s sufficiently inexpensive to support a $5 cheeseburger are simply too dim.” Meanwhile, Braun Enterprises’ Dan Braun, who heads the partnership that bought the building and the adjacent strip center in 2011, tells the Chronicle‘s Erin Mulvaney that they hope to lease the structure with the barrel-shaped roof penetration to another business once Lucky Burger is out. (Entrepreneurs salivating over the marketing power of a well-known burger stop in the shape of a beer keg might want to note that craft beer bar Revelry on Richmond is set to open soon next door, with hamburgers on the menu.) Lucky Burger plans to wrap up its business — and its last burger — before this Saturday. [Culturemap; Houston Chronicle; previously on Swamplot] Photo: Houston. It’s Worth It.
A.D. PLAYERS SAYS IT’S READY TO BUILD ITS GIANT GALLERIA THEATER COMPLEX, FOR REALS THIS TIME 
A mere decade after the installation of the first “coming soon” sign on the organization’s (then) new never-built-on 4-acre lot on Westheimer Rd. just west of Yorktown, A.D. Players appears ready to begin building the sparkling new theater it’s been promising — and fundraising for — all these years. The company, which produces plays “rooted in Christian values,” has announced it will break ground on the project — sometime this summer. The company hasn’t specified the budget for the building, or how much it’s raised in its 10-year capital campaign, but it is touting a recent $2 million gift from the Houston Texans owner’s Robert and Janice McNair Foundation. The facility will include a 450-seat mainstage, a 300-seat children’s theater, and a 150-seat black box theater. It’ll sit between the 5444 Westheimer office building and CVS. [Houston Business Journal] Rendering: A.D. Players
HOW A DEVELOPER MAKES FRIENDS IN GERMANTOWN 
Fisher Homes owner Terry Fisher has been scuffling with city officials and residents of the Germantown Historic District over the dilapidated state of the recently renovated 104-year-old bungalow at 121 Payne St. that he bought last year, got permission for a 2-story addition, but then let sit for months with an opened-up roof protected only by a blue tarp. Fisher may have had some difficulties maintaining the sticks and stones on his property (“demolition by neglect” is how one inspector put it), but he sure has demonstrated a way with words: “The neighbors and anyone else who doesn’t like me is welcome to go walk off a bridge,” he reportedly texted to Woodland Heights Civic Association member David Jordan: “Just try and remember I am a property owner in that neighborhood also and I’m just as important as the others. Considering how much I own, I may be more important.†The latest document attesting to that importance: the violation letter he received from the planning department ordering him to stop work on the Payne St. property and address concerns identified by the inspector. But Fisher tells reporter Erin Mulvaney his text to Jordan has been taken out of context: “God gave me two cheeks and I do what I can to turn them, but enough is enough,” he tells her, explaining that he lives in Spring, rather than in the Heights, where many of his developments are, in part to avoid ending up next door to a development he doesn’t like. “I have done nothing wrong,” Fisher says, “I’m not just a big bad developer. I’m a human, too.” But wait, there’s more: “I’m not ashamed of anything, including the Payne house,” says Fisher, who according to the article has been developing in Houston for more than 30 years. “At the end of the day,” he tells Mulvaney, “I’ve never done anything intentionally wrong. Anything has been out of ignorance.” [Houston Chronicle ($); previously on Swamplot] Photo of 121 Payne St. in better times: HAR
THE 3-DAY ROAD AHEAD 
We’re heading off now for a little Memorial driveabout. Our best wishes for a rejuvenating and memorable Memorial Day weekend. After an extra day of rest, Swamplot will be back on Tuesday with more Houston real estate wonders. If you’re missing us and you haven’t already, please follow us on Facebook and sign up for the Swamplot mailing list. Photo of Memorial Dr.: Matthew Rutledge [license]
COMMENT OF THE DAY: THE INSIDE STORY OF 4004 MONTROSE BLVD. 
“I worked on this project. The architect was Compendium (long defunct) and Jay Baker was the lead designer. There are indeed at least 20 different floor plans, from flats to three story units with roof decks. The ‘roof decks’ came about because some of the units exit up and across the roof to shared fire exit stair towers. All the original kitchen/bath cabinets were by italian cabinetmaker Boffi. It’s very dense, with some very unusual spaces, both in unit interiors and the three exterior plazas; the raised south pool plaza (with glass blocks in the pool looking to the street) is a great space. I agree it needs some cleaning! Before anyone asks, I don’t know why there was no ground floor retail.” [Phil, commenting on More Ups and Downs in a Court at Museums Gate Condo in Montrose]
$4 MILLION BUYS YOU THIS NORTH HOUSTON HOME AND 35 OTHERS KINDA LIKE IT 
This 2005-vintage 1,755-sq.-ft. home at 826 Bandon Ln. in Remington Ranch is just 2.8 percent of the residential wonderfulness you’ll get if you plunk down $4 million for a “package” of 36 homes in North Houston and Spring posted on MLS recently. That averages out to more than $110K each; The seller isn’t identified, but a company called Darland Partners, Ltd. owns a total of 24 properties (including this one) in Harris County; it paid $80,000 for the home pictured above in September of 2012. [HAR]
